Marriage Partnership, Spring 2008By Jill Savage
1. Turn on the electric blanket or heated mattress pad 30 minutes before he heads to bed.
2. Empty the dishwasher or do the dishes without being asked.
3. Make coffee or tea in the morning and take it to the bathroom while she is getting ready.
4. Unload the groceries and put them away—especially if your spouse went to the store alone.
5. Open her car door.
6. Make his favorite dessert.
7. Surprise your spouse by cleaning and vacuuming his car.
8. While your spouse is in the shower, throw a towel in the dryer, then place the heated towel where he can reach it.
9. Take the children for a couple hours and give her some time alone.
10. Put your arm around her in church.
11. Rub her back or feet.
12. Buy his favorite candy bar or magazine when you stop to fill your gas tank.
13. Show excitement about doing something your spouse wants to do.
14. Warm the car and scrape the windows after a frost or snow.
15. Tell your friends—and family!—how smart your spouse is.
16. Fill your spouse's car with gas when you drive it.
17. Invite her to cuddle while watching television.
18. Take off a half-day just for the two of you.
19. Fold and put away the laundry.
20. Pray a blessing over your spouse—then tell him or her what you prayed for.
I Want to Hold Your HandBy Donna FrisingerMy stepdad was just beginning to come out of the anesthetic after minor surgery. As I watched him regain consciousness, before he even opened his eyes, he reached for my mother's hand. A simple act, yet so profound. It was a straightforward, spontaneous reflex that said, I need you. I love you. I'm so glad you're here for me.
I remember the first time my husband reached for my hand. It was our first date, and we were at the Circle Theater in Indianapolis to see The Sound of Music. Somewhere between "Climb Every Mountain" and "Something Good," I felt him cautiously span the short distance to grasp my fingers, then hold on for dear life.
I didn't breathe for a few seconds, as I tried to keep my eyes focused on the big screen. Slowly, I relaxed and let my fingers curl into his. They fit perfectly.
Forty years later, that's how we go to sleep each night: holding hands. I don't remember exactly when we started this ritual, but it's one I cherish.
A recent study of how human touch affects neural stress release indicated that married women who hold their husband's hand feel instant relief from extremely stressful situations.
Tom DeMaio, a clinical psychologist in Charlottesville, North Carolina, says that he often recommends that couples hold hands during an argument. "It keeps them connected when they are trying to work things out during tough times," he says.
Sounds like a plan to me.
Real. That's how I feel when Barry and I hold hands. Sometimes I can't even tell where his hand ends and mine begins. We are one, as God meant us to be.Copyright © 2008 by the author or Christianity Today International/Marriage Partnership magazine. Click here for reprint information on Marriage Partnership.Spring 2008
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