Sunday, September 14, 2008


During the period of adolescence, the individual adolescent begin to exhibit some sexual behaviors. Among these behaviors are dating, attraction, love and premarital sex. These are briefly discussed.
DATING BEHAVIOUR: Dating is a period which precedes going steady. Dating may lead to courtship. It is a period when adolescent begin to meet and discuss on future relationship.
Dating behavior then means how adolescents of opposite sex carry themselves during dates. Suffice to note that many researchers have worked extensively on dating. They have concluded that dating does not take place in a particular time of the year.
Obviously, we have so many types of dates among these are; MOVIE DATE,LUNCH DATE,DINNER DATE,FELLOWSHIP DATE, PARTIES DATE ETC. Generally, when dating is to be made, the male will ask the female if she will not mind to go on a lunch date with him. The manner of request varies. The most important is that whoever is asking should be polite and modest.
During dating, men are expected to pay or finance the dates. The expectation of men from ladies during dates is that ladies do not eat or drink too much. Topics for discussion in most cases are raised by men. This is not to say that ladies can not raise topics, but if such is done, the lady must be cautions.
ATTRACTION; This is the extent to which the physique of that individual appeal to the opposite sex. It is very apt to remark that adolescents dwell so much on attraction. Some girls prefer tall, slim fair etc while some guys prefer dark, busty or sizeable ladies. Although, preferences differs from individual to individual, adolescent seems to forget the fact that beauty is like a fading flower.
L O V E ; This is the bond of affection between two people. In this context, between two people of opposite sex. There are different types of love.. EROTIC LOVE, AGAPE LOVE,PHILEO LOVE, STORGE LOVE, PHILIA LOVE, PRAGMA LOVE, LODUS LOVE,MANIA LOVE, STARGE LOVE.
EROTIC LOVE: Affection with sexual intercourse.
AGAPE LOVE: Unconditional love – Gods own love.
PHILEO LOVE: Conditional love. STORGE LOVE: parent/child love affection.
PHILIA LOVE: Solid friendship etc. Suffice to say that love has varying styles. PRAGMA LOVE: Most practical aspect of love. LODUS LOVE: Playful styles of love . MANIA LOVE: These love can lead to death-too possessive. STARGE LOVE: Being best of friends.

COURTSHIP: Courtship take place after dating and it precedes marriage. This is a period where the couple learn more about their family history, temperament and compatibility. Learn to understand each other in preparation for marriage.
In other to understand each other, the couple embark upon series of test. Among these tests are namely: TIME TEST- This test the ability to keep to time. EMOTIONAL TEST-This is to test the extent to which one of the couple is emotionally stable. This could be done through deliberate provocation of one another. Other types of test during courtship are DATING TEST,QUARREL TEST,HABIT TEST, SHARING TEST ETC.
Pre-marital sex simply means sex before marriage. It must be born in mind that adolescent is in the period of exploration. The expirations is not unconnected with the hormonal secretion during adolescence. This hormonal secretion increases the sexual drive of the adolescent. This is very natural and normal. Inability to withhold this drive causes an adolescent to seek gratification which more often leads to sexual intercourse before marriage.
These are briefly explained thus.
CURIOUSITY; Remember that adolescents are very anxious to know a lot of things including sex. They wants to know why mum and dad cuddle each other with their room under lock and key. They want to taste and want to feel. This ultimately lead to sex before marriage.
PRESSURE: Adolescent may give in to pressure from peers. According to Papilla(1990) She said many fail under pressure to engage in sexual activity even when they are not ready for it. Most often than not, the pressure to engage in pre-marital sex or early sexual activities are socially based.
MEDIA: Today teenagers quest to watch television set, pornography in computer, obscene pictures in newspapers and magazines etc increases adolescents urge for sex. It must be noted that there is increase in frequency with which sexual matters are being addressed on television through movies and video cassettes. Records even send out more sexual images.
PARENTAL UPBRINGING: The first teacher of a child is the parent. Children learn mostly by imitation. They imitate what their parents do. If parents are promiscuous. Tendencies are that adolescent from such environment may be exposed their parents’ sexual activities.
LACK OF GUIDANCE AND COUNSELING: Where adolescents lack proper guidance and counseling, could lead to early sexual activities, hence premarital sex. If adolescents are not well guided in their sexual behavior, this may lead to premarital sex as they may not know the implication of what they are doing.
PURSUIT OF CAREER: Where individual is pursuing work or career. This may lead to delay marriage. The implication is that such individual uncontrollably engages in sex before marriage.
CULTURE: In some parts of Africa countries, some culture places premium on early marriage thus exposing children even at pre adolescent level to sexual activities. Such culture value the number of children individual have more than life.
When sex is not done in appropriate time and stage, there must be its consequences. Some of these consequences are grave. These are;
DISEASES AND INFECTIONS: There are series of diseases and infections that could be contracted by the adolescent during premarital sex. These are summarized as sexual transmitted infections(STI) Some of which are;gonorrhea,syphilis, etc. However, where not properly treated could lead to infertility.
UNWANTED PREGNANCY: As the name implies, the pregnancy is not wanted. Why this is because the individual at this stage is not ready.
FALL OUT OF EDUCATION: As a result, of this pregnancy, the adolescent stops schooling. The boy may also experience set back as there may be inability of the parents to cope with nurturing pregnancy and paying schools fees.
VISCO VIRGINA FISTULA: Early exposure to sex which may lead to pregnancy and ultimately child bearing have been documented as causing visco virginal fistula ( V.V.F) This is a very serious health problem ravaging the northern parts of Nigeria.
DEATH: The adolescent may want to wriggle out the guilt and shame that are associated with unwanted pregnancy by aborting it. This has resulted into death in some cases.
There is no doubt that the adolescents faces multiple of sex related problems. These are highlighted below;
ATTRACTION: As noted earlier in this write up, attraction is the extent to which the physique of the opposite holds appeal. It must also be mentioned that adolescent adore their body. Hence, they are mindful of their body image. They do this, because they want to be noticed by the opposite sex. They will do all they can to be attractive to the opposite sex. This invariably becomes problem to the adolescent who may not be able to identify natural beauty from man made one.
BURN OUT: When adolescents are dating, and they do this for a very long time without marrying there is tendency that they are bored. This boring situation is what is known as BURN OUT. This always happen when adolescent do not caution themselves and rush into a relationship.
PSYCHOLOGICAL AND PHYSICAL ABUSE: It is possible that adolescents suffer some psychological and physical abuse in their day-to-day sexual activities. Adolescent could be roughly handled. This could be psychological traumatic. Among those ways in which adolescents could be abused is through raping. Rape is when there is sexual intercourse without the consent of the partner whether the boy or the girl.
IGNORANCE ABOUT BODY LANGUAGE: Body language means the extent to which some part of your body responds to touch. The sensitivity of any part of your body that can SWITCH YOU ON. There is no doubt the fact that there are many adolescents that are ignorant of this. Hence, they fall victim of this. This has created problem for them.

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